My L.A. Detox Hell …

Ok gonna fess up straight from the get go , I’ve not really been in a detox hell – in fact its been the exact opposite – but be honest with me here – how many people want to read a blog entitled ‘My detox heaven’ ? No-one right? When we hear the word detox we want to see /hear about some kind of struggle and pain (preferably both) – we all love a good tale of woe is me!

So for all those out of my detox loop (where’ve  you been?) I wrote a blog last month called 50 not out – have a quick butcher’s at it here. So my 30 day detox is up and ‘with my heterosexuality completely intact, I feel fabulous’*!

But more on this later…

I started Yoga in 1853 – ok it wasn’t quite that long ago but some days it feels like that. As mentioned in the above blog I turned 50 recently and I’m starting to feel the pinch a little – more aches more pains (‘more moaning about it’ Lina Ryan , Matt’s wife). Basically I’m knackered all the time.  I resigned myself to the fact I’m now 50 , I’m gonna have to give up practicing those weird and wonderful yoga postures I shamelessly post of myself on Instagram. I was in fear of becoming the very thing I feared the most … a Yoga teacher who doesn’t actually do any yoga (there’s plenty of us, I mean them). Or even worse a Yoga teacher who posts pictures of Buddhas and waterfalls on their insta alongside very clichéd yoga quotes like ‘feel you inner child’ – oh lord please shoot me if I ever start doing that. Anyway I digress. So to cut a long story short (and if you’ve not read the 50 not out blog , shame on you) a friend recommended I try this  detox programme she’d done a few times and it had made a massive difference for her. It was 30 days , involving no meat ( that was easy I’m a veggie) no booze ( not drank for over 20 years mate) no chocolate ( NO FUCKING WAY!) (OK the no chocolate thing has been a little bit of a struggle but not half as hard as I thought it would be). Yesterday the 30 days was up and today I felt that ace that I did some of those fancy smancy yoga postures for the first time in months and months – no kidding. I feel like a born again yogi. And like any good born again yogi do I sit in blissful states of oneness and non-duality? Do I feck I’m gonna be getting my tripod ready to snap some new insta shots of my new fabulous self …

If you want to learn more about my detox you can contact me here.

*George Constanza , Seinfeld Series 2 episode 3